When I first thought of reading my mother’s old letters to my grandmother, it was because I had been listening to CBC radio talking about the polio scares of the 1950s. My husband Pat is five years older than I and can remember the public swimming pools in Windsor being closed because of fear of polio. Had my mother worried about her children being affected, I wondered? I should read her letters and find out. But of course, reading one meant reading them all, for who knew where such information might be buried?
I knew I had letters from my past in boxes somewhere and that some of the boxes from my mother had letters that my grandmother had preserved from their past. I must have considered these of some value, since I had lugged them through our many moves (an average of every three-and-a-half years all our married life). We have made our second-last move (back to our house in Haida Gwaii- the last one will be the one forced on us by old age and infirmities); have as much space as we’ll ever have; Pat and I are retired and thus I had lots of time to consider A Project. So I dug out the boxes, sorted the letters and other documents into binders, and then left them alone for ten years.
My Family Letters Project involves 80 years of letters saved by and written by the women in my nuclear family to their mothers.
The youngest child of twelve, Carol Enid Hazell, was born in St.Vincent, West Indies into the British colonial empire of Queen Victoria. She went to school in England, returned and married Dr. J.M.G. Ewing (Gordon) in St. Vincent, and after World War 1, went to live in Newcastle-upon-Tyne with her husband and daughter. It is hard to imagine how many letters they all wrote over the years: she kept in touch with her mother, brothers, and sisters in the West Indies, Britain, Canada, and the USA; but the only letters she saved were those from her daughter, Cynthia Ewing, written to her mother in Newcastle from boarding school in York, then as an adult, from Cambridge, Toledo, Ann Arbor, and Ottawa. When, in old age, she joined her daughter in Ottawa, she brought those letters with her. Between us, Cyn and I kept my memorabilia and those letters that friends wrote to me, although the letters I wrote home to Ottawa from England and Nigeria sadly seem to have disappeared.
This chain of personal letters to our mothers, of course, involves all our friends and the extended families, personal comments that I hope those living will excuse me publishing, and a lot of little details of life gone by, such as the information that my mother at boarding school as a teenager would have her hair washed every three weeks. [Letter dated May 8th, 1929] To the 21st century reader, this results in several thoughts, including ‘ick’, but also: at 14, someone else washes her hair? also, what did they all look like? and, oh that explains a few puzzling incidents in that Chalet School series (written in the 30s).
Adding to the vicarious enjoyment of these letters is the fact that nothing very distressing ever happens because no one wants to upset her mother: so agonizing experiences (if any) are kept private and don’t enter into the flow of weekly letters; and major events happen off stage since the family tends to get together in a crisis and so no letters are written, and the accident or crisis is only referred to afterwards.
As well, it should be admitted, I come from a very fortunate family: on both sides generally, there was health and enough wealth, in spite of the Depression and World War Two, no great tragedies happened, and if all marriages were not successful, most were, families were loving, and children were treasured. For me, reading these was like enjoying a familiar novel, or maybe a prequel: you know the main characters and the ending, but you are getting all sorts of new and entertaining information. As the boxes reached my memorabilia, 40 years ago rather than 80, there were notes and cards from my past, and that walk down memory lane was fun too. Those notes and artifacts add variety, since they are from friends to me- the odd letter in the collection from someone else added interest to my mother’s letters, but in 1951 she tells her mother how much she and my father enjoy the letters they get, but also says she is going to burn them since the collection was getting so bulky. How glad I am that my grandmother kept Cyn’s letters, one-sided though the conversation is.
So I read the letters, put them in chronological order in plastic sleeves and binders, annotated them with stickies when I recognized the names, and supplemented the narrative with the oral stories I’d heard all my life. My grandmother had a box of loose photos too, so I have slipped them in the sleeve too if relevant. My mother took a writing class in her 70s, and wrote short stories about her mother’s life: the eruption, the earthquake, fictionalized versions of family sagas. I include similar tales we loved as kids: our mother being naughty with a midnight feast at boarding school. And long term? As I wrote to my 97-year-old godmother in England, I can’t help thinking there is a thesis in here somewhere. Now we have the Internet, I think publishing these may be a contribution to the domestic history of the 20th century. My grandmother kept the letters from her daughter, and enjoyed reading them and putting them in order in her old age, and there are indications that my mother looked them over as well before her sight went. Now we have the technology I feel they should serve a wider purpose than bringing a smile to my face as I enter old age. The collection may lack drama for an outside reader, but the small details of life in the last century are strangely compelling. So I am posting these online and sharing the love with the world- because what these years of letters do show is a century of caring and long families and teasing, friends and connections and love.
Dearest Lindy, Forgive my long silence! but here I am to wish you a very happy 1970. May it be full of fun & hard work! From what my Cyn writes, you all seem to have had a wonderful Christmas with lots of entertaining & lovely presents. Your poor Mum I gave her a hard time choosing presents for you all from me but she did wonders I think don’t you? I think I gave you a wallet & hope you like it. Sorry my small pkt to you had not got there, in time, but hope you have it by now, & realize that the donkies are for your ‘bottom draw’ is it still in such a mess?? Your Xmas dinner party was quite a ‘League of Nations’ & the Lab party even more so eh? We spent a very quiet Xmas, just our two selves – as our P.G. Ruth Hazell was out for both lunch & supper with relatives. We went to church at 7 a.m. then, after breakfast, opened our presents, & I now want to give you a kiss! & thank you so much for the very sweet little wood carved créche which came from you & Charles. I was lucky as usual, did you see the gay material yr Mum sent me also the nice beaded handbag. Peggy gave me a beautiful box of powder & a bottle of ‘Bond Street’ perfume, my favourite- Percy Verrall a pretty silver filagree Indian brooch – U. Fred & Ena are giving us stools to sit on when we go weeding in the garden but they are not ready yet! A.M. gave me writing paper & a [D.E.] Stevenson book ‘Miss Buncle Married’ not so good as some of her others I don’t think. Are there any by her that you have not read? Suddenly St. V. was quite swamped by steel framed swivel book stands & masses of paperback novels. So we gave all the Hughes p.b. novels as they are all fond of reading – but not like you I’m sure! I just phoned to ask when Rosemary was leaving for England, Margie answered & said she goes on the 16th. She told me she was just back from Bequia- it was lovely, but the sea was very rough, it looks so from my window. There is a big Tourist Boat in the bay, I hope it stays late as they look so pretty, all lighted up. You may recall you wrote me away back before Thanksgiving, but it didn’t meet me in U.S.A. & was some long time finding me, but I did enjoy it, especially as you told me exactly what subjects you were taking, how do you like Psychology, is it intriguing? You said you had 2 or 3 W.I. girls at Trent – which islands do they come from & how do they like the snow now? [I remember Coralie shrieking with delight as she twirled outside in the first snowfall, but the cold and continued pile-up of snow in a Canadian winter got old soon! There was a reason my grandmother had visited us in the summer!] I hear by radio you’re having very severe weather. We had a slight earthquake on Xmas day, but we were driving in Cox’s taxi, so never felt it. Ford & Mill packed their cases, and left for Florida & sunshine right after Xmas, which Mona & Owen spent with them, but had to return to Long Beach & duty, but Mona must be lonesome as Margs & Bill are in California with Alan & Donna for Xmas. [These are the nieces she had spent the rest of the summer with in New York.] Now Honey Girl I must dry up & will try & write oftener in ’70. We are having it nice & cool now, in fact, nearly blown away! [Inserted sideways on the first page:] Very much love, & write soon – God bless you in 1970,
The Costains drove down to Brantford to visit the Moors (Cec’s sister Merle and extended family) for New Year’s and dropped Linda at her residence in Peterborough on their way back to Ottawa.
Tuesday 6th Jan. Little Christmas.
Dearest Lindy, I have been doing N.S. accounts & have to go to the Bank with cheques, so this is only going to be a short letter. Anyway, there is really no news! I am sorry that I was in bed when you called on Sun. evening, but I was tired after the drive. I hear from Mrs. Pierce that the Cravens took Jean back on Sat. & then on to Hamilton with Tim & had a dreadful drive – bad weather & accidents, etc. so we were very lucky. Saki puss was at the door to meet us & seemed very glad to have company again. She purred & purred when we petted her, but seemed quite happy & contented. The hamster was fat & cute as ever & apparently Steve was amazed at how much pablum she ate – their hamster never ate so much! I had better make her some more as I must take her back this afternoon – oh, I have just phoned Gertrude & she says Sunday will do, so we will keep her for a few more days! It is so cold it is a shame to take the poor little thing out in it. [Cyn was obviously the Nursery School’s official hamster babysitter as well as the accountant.]
Thank you for your sweet little note on the sewing machine – it was such a surprise & I think I have a very nice daughter. I’m glad it was a good holiday, honey – I enjoyed it & it was fun down at Brantford for a good ending. I hear from Daddy that all your friends came trickling in after we left & you must have had fun catching up on all the news. Did they approve of your new garments? Charlie was telling me of new clothes Joanne wore yesterday & Maureen had a new coat, so he is being observant! I saw Fanni this morning & a friend sent her a ‘fun-fur’ coat from Paris – rabbit! On her it looks cute. I think you should go out & see if you can’t get a pair of ski slacks – see if there isn’t a good Ladies Wear Shop or a Sportswear. I spent all day yesterday, tidying up & washing & taking down the Christmas tree- now everything looks very drab. I have the oddments to put away now & then we are back to the routine once more. I go to Mrs. Lockwood’s for lunch tomorrow, so that is the end of the parties. Do you remember the Sunday School Mother who suddenly asked me to a party? I haven’t heard anymore, thank goodness – I was all prepared to say Daddy had such a bad cold! Must stop & go & do the chores 1. N.S. Bank 2. Library- Agatha Christie pay book – wow! 3. Groceries 4. Get the car washed. [Might seem like a strange thing to do in the middle of the snow and ice, but the salt used on the roads rusted away the bottom of the cars and Cec insisted.] Hope you have more essays back & are happy with the results. I felt very lonely yesterday, all alone – I miss you! Lots of love from us all – Mummy.
Dearest Mummy, In true Boxing Day style, I feel quite SOGGY today! Very content & tired & lazy, but I felt I must write & thank you for your Christmas presents & also we heard on the news today that Dominica had big earthquake tremors yesterday afternoon and we are wondering if you felt them too. What a horrid thing on Christmas Day, but fortunately they said there was no damage & no one hurt.
I hope you had a really happy day and lots of nice presents & goodies. Your little parcel to Lindy hasn’t arrived yet, but I got new wallets for Cec & Linda & one for Charlie for his birthday from you & they were all greeted with cheers. They all needed them & I was able to get really nice ‘Buxton’ ones with your money so they were very pleased. For Charlie’s Christmas I got him a good Parker pen. He has just had cheap ball points usually & lost them so frequently that it wasn’t worth while getting him anything else, but he was saying he would like a Parker pen one day, so I thought he would probably take care of it now & he was delighted. After buying all these things for the family from you I got quite frantic wondering what to get me, before I spent your money on bacon and marmalade and coffee! Not that there was nothing I wanted, but what to choose! In the end, I got a dark red wool skirt – it is pleated all round & I look a bit like one of those plump hula girls in it, but I like it! I have a dark red sweater which matches & thank you very much! We had a lovely Christmas, but strenuous of course! We set out for Midnight Service at about 10:45 pm on Christmas Eve & picked up Mrs. Martin. Charlie was serving & Lindy in the choir & of course the church was full- lots of young people which was nice. Afterwards we went home & got to bed about 2 & how nice that L. & C. don’t wake us at the crack of dawn now! We opened stockings & had breakfast at about 9:30 am, & then L. & C. went to 10:30 church & I washed up, made beds, stuffed the turkey & got it in the oven at 12:00. By then they were home & we opened presents – Charlie’s big present was a tape recorder which he longed for, so his day was made. I got a lovely ‘hostess gown’ & slippers, L. a ski jacket & Cec car seat covers etc. Will send a list later. Our guests for dinner, Dr. & Mrs. Shimizu, from Japan & Helga & Gisbert Winniwisser & little Karsten from Germany came at 5 o’clock & they all enjoyed our Canadian Christmas dinner. My pudding flamed beautifully & we had crackers & wore paper hats!
Paper Hats!
Will write properly later – have a big Lab party here tomorrow. Lots of love & thanks & happy New Year from us all to you & Auntie Moo. Love Cyn.
This is the Trent Christmas card. It makes me smile because it is a very honest card, black and white, showing snow, concrete buildings and grey, grey, grey. It shows a Canadian winter and 60s architecture and drives me to reminisce. Perhaps I would feel differently if I had lived in residence in one of those grey cement buildings on the Trent Campus but I did not- I lived in a long low three-story residence, long corridors with rooms on each side with wooden floors that creaked, linked to an original old Peterborough house that had been repurposed as Traill College in the middle of the town. The kitchen and dining room were in another refurbished house next door, we caught buses to get to the Library or our lectures and classes on campus, although tutorials in professor’s offices depended on which college they were attached to. Such a luxury to stroll down two flights of stairs to my English tutorial at Traill without having to go out in the cold! Peterborough, Ontario is a pretty place, and I first saw the Trent University campus outside of town in the spring after the school year was over, with apple blossom blooming, the hills around green, the river sparkling, and the grey buildings new, modern, and impressive. In the fall when I started Trent it was lovely, and as it got colder, the hills behind covered with sumac bushes turned red and orange and still looked great. But I never again saw blossom- for most of the university year the grey buildings were stained with rain, or covered with snow. Crossing the bridge over the frozen? river to the lecture halls was a windy experience and I was so glad I was not in Science and didn’t need to do it very often. I only needed to enter the colleges on the campus to go to seminar rooms or tutorials, so I never got to know much about Lady Eaton or Champlain Colleges. I badly sprained my ankle on the steep snow-covered stairs going down into Champlain on the way to a cast party in second or third year- the same arthritic ankle due to have its third surgery this summer. So this card is a true picture of Trent for me. However, as my mother’s last letter of December 3 1969 shows, my experience of Trent was wonderful. I enjoyed my classes, I made friends in residence and in class, and met a more varied population of older students and professors when I joined the Gilbert and Sullivan group so I could sing. At larger universities, my observation was that the students in the performing arts field fill these sorts of extra-curricular activities, and there was little chance of getting involved in them if you belonged to a different discipline. At Trent, opportunities were open. The faculty at Trent was also unusual- with a diversity (of the time, mind you- no women taught me, although the Head of Traill College was a woman) that occurred naturally because it was a new school and had hired from around the world. At commencement when the professors appeared robed, there were a multitude of colours from different universities in assorted countries, and even fringes and bobbles as well as unusual hats. There were older men, expert in their fields but also interested in teaching- Trent offered only an undergraduate degree at the time. And there were many younger academics at the beginning of their careers at this new university, who stayed there and helped Trent grow. Because the Trent population was small (as I have said, smaller than my High School had been) faculty and students mixed more than was possible at larger universities and the cast of ‘The Mikado’ included students from the four years in the choruses, and the soloists in the main roles included young professors as well as students. Our music director was a professional who made the necessary learning and rehearsing challenging but enjoyable, adding the stage moves and dance later involved more people and was more fun, and from that first year show came my involvement in more singing groups later- a town-and-gown group in Peterborough and a small madrigal/motet group in the English professor’s office in Traill just for fun, not for performance. Living in Peterborough meant that the bank, bus station, and stores were within (a long) walking distance, and the most wonderful shop was the Trent University Bookstore. Of course I had never met a bookstore I didn’t like, but this one had- as well as all the necessary textbooks- some other books I wanted to read, and records I wanted to buy which expanded my horizons, as well as interesting things to look at. I saw my first live hockey game in Peterborough (so Canadian), and admired (without the slightest desire to emulate) the rowers on the river who practiced their racing skills (so Oxbridge). I was lucky that I went to Trent in the early days, that I lived in residence in town, that I made friends and had fun as well as enjoying my work. I went to class, wrote essays, did well, and continued to grow up. My parents had insisted that going away to university was what they wanted us to do and they not only paid for the whole experience, they were right! Trent was a positive step towards my career in education, and as I taught the next generation of high school students in Ontario, Nigeria, the Northwest Territories, and British Columbia through the 70s to the 2000s, I remained convinced that education is any country’s best hope and must be encouraged. I can reminisce fondly about my university years, and wish that everyone who wants further education could get it. I wish we could change the system and rather than encourage our government to forgive student loans (although that would be a first step), actually support all students in all educational endeavours like more advanced countries!
Dearest Mummy, I am sorry that I have been such a long time in writing, but what with Cec, and Lindy, and all the Graduation goings-on I seem to have been in a whirl, and then I had to rush madly and get off the English parcels and then the Christmas cards. They were late, but at least they have gone – can you imagine Nan’s parcel was here before I even sent hers, but it was not even the last week in November, so I felt that she was very early, not me very late! I can’t even remember, when I last wrote, and from your letter of the 23rd, I can’t quite gather if I had told you of Cec’s operation or not. I remember sending you bits of Linda’s dresses, so it was sometime in the middle of Nov. and in case it was before the operation, Cec had it on the 11th, and had the right side of his thyroid gland removed. It was very hard and calcified, but not malignant, and apparently is some strange sort of infection where it infects and rejects itself. The incision is at the base of his neck in front and Cec says that he has had his throat cut! He was dopey and uncomfortable when I went in to see him the first night, but by the next afternoon, he was very cheerful and talking and eating didn’t seem to bother him too much. He was tired by the evening, of course, but next day, Thursday, he was up and walking around, but I still could hardly believe him when he said, the Dr. had said he could probably come home on the Fri. or Sat. Then on Fri. morning the phone rang and here he was saying ‘Come and get me’. I was amazed, and had to rush around as I had washed my hair, and it was all in curlers, but the dryer soon did the job and I went to the Hospital, and Cec was home for lunch. He was really marvellous, and, although I don’t think he was feeling quite as frisky when he got home as he expected, he never complained but he was restless and couldn’t settle to anything for a day or so. However, he soon began to eat well and sleep well, and the wound healed very quickly, but he still is wearing a cravat in his open shirt as his neck is still a bit swollen, and he finds a buttoned collar and tie a bit uncomfortable. I took him to see the Dr the following Thursday, and he said that he could go back to work when he wanted to but to take it easy, so that since then he has been going in late in the morning, and coming home a little early. The first week I drove him as he couldn’t turn his head very easily, but he is driving himself now. Lea (Cec’s sister) was saying that when she trained as a nurse that any patient with a thyroid operation was kept lying in bed on his back for 2 weeks with a sandbag on either side of his head and he wasn’t allowed to move an inch. Isn’t it fantastic how things have changed and mustn’t it have been miserable? Last week Cec went to another specialist, an endocrinologist or something like that, to get a test to see how his remaining thyroid was acting, and he has to take a little thyroid pill every morning, and will have to do this for the rest of his life, but this is a very common thing now I understand. Little Mrs. Martin was in the Hospital and had a hysterectomy operation the same day as Cec had his – she had a prolapse. I took her some flowers the next day when I went in to see Cec thinking that she would not be feeling very well, and I would just go for a minute, but here she was as cheerful as could be, and all ready for a chat! Amazing! She didn’t have her tum split like me and apparently it isn’t such a big operation the other way. She was home in less than a week and one of her daughters came for a week and now she is on her own again and doing very well. Her husband is in the hospital permanently (we hope) now as he is quite helpless and incontinent and she isn’t able to lift him and do all the work.
The week after Cec came home with the big Graduation weekend! What a Wild Whirl! I had both of the dresses nicely finished, and Charlie’s suit all pressed, so I spent most of Friday cooking and baking so that everything would be ready. Bruce had phoned that his bus from Toronto arrived at 5:15 and Lindy’s was coming at 5:45 so that worked out very nicely. Charlie and I went down to meet them but of course both buses were a bit late so we collected them eventually, Lindy wildly excited, and dashed home. I had dinner in the oven, so we ate at once then they rushed to get dressed as they were supposed to be down at the High School at 7:30 and the ceremony began at 8:00. I had spent $10 on film for Cec’s camera and mine and flash bulbs for both and so Cec and I were already and waiting when they came down, but what happened? My flash didn’t work, and everyone was saying hurry, hurry, we’ll be late, and Cec took a couple of pictures of Linda alone, and that was it! It was the only thing that I was disappointed in the whole weekend – it was the same thing the next night when they were all dressed for the dance – they were late and in a hurry, and although my flash worked then it was so rushed. Cec’s idea is to stand them in a row and take a picture or sit them in a row and say smile, but I like to take my time and have them relax and not beaming at the camera, but goodness knows what we did get in the end. When Linda is home for Christmas I’ll take more pictures of her and Charlie and their finery so you will get to see them eventually. When we got down to the High School Linda and Charlie went off and Cec and Bruce and I got quite good seats in the auditorium – it was nearly full even then, but we got fairly near the front and at the side. Now that it is such a huge High School (1800 students) there were so many girls and boys graduating, as there are both Gd. 12 and Gd. 13 students. There were all sorts of awards and Janek and Janet got some and of course we knew lots of the kids. Both of ours went up and got their diplomas without incident, like tripping over their feet or anything! Linda’s dress looked very nice, and she said that she got all sorts of compliments over it. She had her contact lenses in of course, and Janet has now got them and was wearing them, so they felt very pleased with themselves. One sad thing was that Joanne didn’t graduate – she failed 2 subjects and will have to take at least one of them in night school to make up the subjects she needs before she can graduate, but it was such a pity as they have gone right through school together. This meant that Linda felt she couldn’t even talk to her about graduation or dresses, etc. and Janet wasn’t going to the dance so she couldn’t talk to her about evening dresses, so she had to be very tactful! Of all Lindy’s friends and girls who went through school with her – Jean Craven, Janet, Joanne, Mara Arndt, Carol Ann, etc.. none of them got dates for the dance, so I kept patting myself on the back and thinking how clever I was to have invited Brucie, because it just made the weekend for Lindy to be in on all the festivities, and I know she will look back on it as a really happy time.
After the Graduation, there was a reception at the school for everyone – this was about 11 o’clock or more as the thing took so long with all the speeches and everything – and all of us parents congratulated each other and all the boys and girls caught up on the news! We introduced Bruce to everyone and introduced Charlie’s girlfriend, Maureen to Cec and Bruce. She is a nice little girl – rather like Janet, small and dark, but not quite so freckly! She isn’t all that pretty, but is lively and bright and amusing, which Charlie enjoys! After we had chatted, and had coffee and cookies – by the way, the change in Lindy is fantastic – she was dashing up to people and chatting – boys and girls – which she never would have done before – and we went home, or at least Charlie went off with some of his pals for a while – but the rest of us went home and sat and talked some more. Cec was quite tired as it was his first social outing, so he and I went to bed and left the kids to gab till goodness knows when! On Sat. morning, we got up late, but Lindy had an appointment at the Eye Dr. so I suggested that Bruce should go downtown in the car with her and then while she was in the Dr’s, he could drive around and see where the Skyline Hotel was and the parking etc. so that he would know where it all was for the dance that evening. While they were gone, Charlie had to go for his driving lesson, so he had an early lunch and went, and they came in late, Lindy having taking Bruce to see the Arts Centre, so the day just seem to fly. I had ordered corsages for the 2 boys from the greenhouses, so they drove over later in the afternoon to pick them up. I had got Lindy a pretty wrist corsage of little yellow rosebuds for her graduation from Cec and me, and then Bruce had phoned and asked me to order her a corsage of 2 gardenias for the dance. I had said to Charlie that he must find out what colour Maureen’s dress was so that he could get flowers to match, and he made me laugh so much. He asked one of her friends who said Maureen was wearing a pink dress, and Charlie replied, quite seriously ‘Oh dear. It will clash with my mauve suit’ and he said the girl looked at him with stunned horror and said ‘You can’t really mean it!’ so that Charlie just couldn’t keep a straight face any longer! Anyway, he got her a very pretty wrist corsage (on a little elastic bracelet) of baby pink rose, buds, and the gardenias were lovely too. It was a dinner dance, but not starting till 8:30 so we had a buffet supper at 6 and then they went and got ready. Bruce looked very nice – he is quite conventional but always immaculately groomed, and he has a dark suit, whereas Charlie looked much more young ‘mod’ type in his green! Lindy looked lovely in her dress, and was delighted with it. It was very plain, but suited her exactly, and it was a comfortable sort of dress too with no fuss, so that she could be comfortable in it. She had gold sandals to match the gold on her graduation dress, and I got her a little gold evening handbag, so to co-ordinate her evening dress, which had silver in it, I got a very pretty beaded trim, just to go around the neck. It was just about an inch wide and was long gold and silver beads with pearls and I got her a pair of little gold earrings with a single pearl hanging from a little chain so it all looked very nice. I had great fun getting all these glamorous, things ready – a long time since I used to get them for myself!
I have changed to Charlie’s typewriter as the ribbon in mine is mostly holes! I got a new one which turns out to be the wrong size, so this is better. The young people set off to pick up Maureen at 8 o’clock, so there were Cec and I left – the old people at home! Cec said that we should go out on the town too, but we were left without even a car to get us anywhere! We spent a nice peaceful evening, and went to bed about midnight. I knew that they were going to a party at a friend of Charlie’s, Dave Grimes, afterwards (oh, I forgot – they left before 8 because they went to a party before the dance too – another friend of Charlie’s!) So Cec left the lights on, but I woke up at about 5 am and was very curious to know if they were safely in their beds, so got up and peeked out the door and sure enough the lights were out! They told me afterwards that the dance finished about 12:30-1:00, and then they went to Dave’s and stayed till about 3:15. The party was still going on and they had an invitation to go to a breakfast party at 6 am, but they decided to call it a night and took Maureen home and then came back and sat and talked the whole thing over for an hour or so!
Linda and Charlie were very good and got up and went to the 10:30 service with me and then I had decided that as both the dinners we had had were very hurried affairs, I would have a nice dinner at lunchtime, as Bruce and Lindy were both leaving by bus at 3:45, so we had Fondue Bourguignon then afterwards an angel food cake with fruit and jello in the middle and covered with whipped cream. Bruce loves desserts with fruit and cream and so I always get great pleasure in making him something special. We had a very nice leisurely lunch and then the 2 of them packed and I washed up and we were just in nice time to take them down to the bus station. Lindy got the Toronto bus with Bruce as it was quicker, and she could get off just outside Peterborough, and get a taxi to her college, which we thought was worthwhile for them to have company on the trip. They all seem to have a really good time and enjoy every minute, and apart from the rush, I enjoyed it too, and felt that it all went beautifully. Linda had 2 essays to do when she went back, so she has been busy, but in her letter today got them finished and handed in and was feeling very relieved. She also had a date with a nice boy Jim, who is in her English class – she likes him, and has talked to him since the beginning, but he is shy and lives in Peterborough, so isn’t in and around the college all the time like those in residence, so she felt she wasn’t getting very far but he has invited her out this evening. Really her first proper date! She has joined the Choral Society of the University, and they are putting on ‘The Mikado’ in the spring, and she is in the chorus, and is enjoying it very much. Whenever she comes home, she is singing bits all the time and when she leaves we have it embedded in our minds! I am delighted that she is going on singing and very pleased, because none of her friends at the college are doing this – she just joined and went ahead with it on her own so she is really becoming independent. When Charlie and I came back from the Bus Station after taking Lindy and Bruce, we found Cec asleep on the family room sofa, and I lay down on the sitting room sofa and had a nap, so the older members of the family were exhausted, I don’t know what about the younger ones! Charlie brought home a lovely surprise one day that week – his Progress Report, in which he doesn’t get actual marks, but A B C’s etc. and he got an A in every subject he took, and A for effort in all of them! They call this a Straight A Report and it is the very best one can get, so you can imagine how delighted we were. He is doing very well this year – he has got rid of things like History and Geography which he never cared for and is taking lots of Math, Physics, Chemistry, English, and French. He works hard what and with the Math and Science course has lots more work to do than Linda last year, but he really likes it and the Math and Science is no effort for him. He has just had an English essay to do ‘The character and composition of the Elizabethan Audience’ and that is much more of a toil for him, but he is very conscientious and does a very good job in the end. I have been very busy the last little while while trying to organize a present for Marjorie and Dick Graham for their Silver Wedding Anniversary. It is in the middle of Dec. and I knew it was coming off and that Marjorie planned to have an Open House without telling people it was her anniversary. I had thought I would just give something small, but Eve phoned me and said were we getting together and if so she and her mother would like to join. So I have been phoning people and trying to collect money and decide what to get etc. We at first thought we would get her silver candlesticks as she had none and we knew that she would like some, but unfortunately another friend gave her some, so we were stuck. We thought we wouldn’t get more than about 20 dollars which isn’t enough for an entrée dish, and when I looked at the other silver sauce boats bonbon dishes etc. they all seem so useless. Then I had a bright idea. Marjorie has been getting cut glass glasses and wine glasses, etc. but I knew that she didn’t have a wine decanter, so Ruth Lockwood and I went shopping one day and have got them such a pretty crystal cut glass wine decanter. It is not very big, but very dainty and pretty and to tie in with the silver part, we got one of those silver labels on little chains, saying ‘Sherry’ and put it on, and it looks very nice and everyone is pleased with it. Now to try to get and get my money collected! I have a card for everyone to sign, and I am going to take the present to our Coffee Party which is on Sat. morning and will hide it behind my Handicraft Counter and have people come and peek at it and sign the card. Marjorie will be too busy selling at her Baking Counter to notice, I hope! The open house is on 13 December and I am going on the Friday to give her a hand and then will help on the day and Linda is going to help Jeanie pass around. The WA are going to give her a centrepiece of flowers for the table – the present is just from some of us old timers! One night last week I went to the Arts Centre with Margaret and Peter Savic to see the opera ‘Mignon’. They had been going to take a friend, who was sick and had flu, so the night before Margaret phoned and invited me and I was delighted because what with Cec in hospital, etc. it seemed ages since I had been out. The opera was lovely (in French) and I enjoyed it very much and of course, as usual, the people in the audience at the Arts Centre are always an additional entertainment! We were also invited out on Sunday. Ottawa has been in the grips of a violent Football Fever! The Ottawa team, the Ottawa Roughriders beat Toronto to win the Eastern Championship and then last Sunday the Grey Cup Game was played in the big stadium in Montreal against the Western Champions, the Saskatchewan Roughriders! The captain of the Ottawa team has been very popular for ages, and is a wonderful player, Russ Jackson, and it was his last year in football. He is also Ass. Principal in one of the high schools, and he is retiring this year, so everyone was hoping that his last year would be a good one. It turned out it couldn’t have been better – he won all sorts of awards – Best Canadian player – best this and best that, and the Grey Cup Game last Sunday was the Grand Final. Ottawa won that too after a very exciting game and everyone was just about delirious with joy! Phyl Douglas had phoned and invited us to come over on the Sunday afternoon to see the game on their Colour TV so we accepted with pleasure. Phyl said for Charlie to come too as it was not a party but just them, but when we arrived about 12:30 here arrived Margie and Cy Garrett too sporting big green and white Saskatchewan colours! We had lots of fun, although Charlie was much more subdued in company than he is at home watching a game, but Margie and Phyl screamed and yelled so I did my share too. It was exactly the kind of game I like – Ottawa began to win quite early in the game so I didn’t have to suffer too much! When it was over Andy Douglas drove Charlie home as he was busy with an essay and we sat and chatted and then Phyl gave us a delicious dinner. By the time it was over and we’d had coffee we said we must go and arrived home about 8:15 having been there nearly 8 hours! It was a lovely party!
As I mentioned we are having our Coffee Party on Sat. morning at the Church. How did your Bazaar go? I hope that you did very well after all your hard work and made lots of money. Our Coffee Party is not really a big affair, but I have made some funny little things. When I made my Christmas cakes I made about 24 little ones in cupcake paper cases and then I brushed over the top with boiled syrup glaze and stuck on glace cherries and pineapple to make them look pretty. I have wrapped each one in saran wrap and have it called them Christmas Mini-cakes! Then I had half a bottle of Sauterne and half a bottle of port and some claret, so I got some Certo and made different kinds of Wine Jelly. I got little baby food glass jars from a lady at church and have 22 little jars of jelly, all different reds and yellows – very alluring! I will make my gingerbread men as usual and decorate them and wrap them separately and we get 10¢ each for them and I am also making some little kind of candy/cookies some called rum balls, and others Mocha Truffles (they have brandy in them!) I have some pretty little flowered paper cases for candy, so will put them in these and then my empty Christmas card boxes have cellophane lids, so I will arrange them in these, and I think they will look very attractive. The last thing I have done is the funniest. The nursery school has some funny little shapes of wood for glueing and painting, etc. so I have taken round ones and made little faces on them and stuck on white beards of rabbit fur and pointed red felt hats and then painted other funny oblongs, rounded bits, balustrade shapes, etc. red and stuck the heads on top and made funny little Santa Claus decorations. They look very peculiar, but maybe the children will like them, and buy them! Anyway, this has been taking up my time! Mme. Gemuse is here today, so I have been typing (it is now Thurs. 4th.) and think I should go and do some sewing. I have a ‘Jump Suit’ cut out for Lindy. This is a kind of slacks and top all in one, which is all the Thing just now. I got some warm check material to make her one for the winter, thinking it would be cozy, then I thought she might like a vivid gay one for evenings in college, so I got that and cut it out, but haven’t sewn a stitch yet. The gay one is all blues and wines and green – rather like stained glass window colours, and I am so pleased, I got some of that velvet rouleau stuff in the exact colours, and it will make such a pretty tie belt for the waist. I have also got myself some silvery-greyish material to make a dress for Marjorie’s party so I had better get busy. I can’t make up my mind as to whether I like this material or not – it is the same kind of laminated material as Lindy’s evening dress but I wanted something more practical so stayed away from pastel colours and very silvery goldy things, and this was what was left. I can wear it with black shoes and will get more wear out of it than I do something more glamorous, but I can’t make up my mind if I will look nice in it! It has a zigzag pattern, and Ruth L. says it is a bit ‘busy’ and I agree, so we will have to see how it looks! I am glad to hear that your very hot weather is over and know how glad you will be to have it cooler and some rain for your garden. We have had quite a nice time so far without bitterly cold weather and until this week just the merest powdering of snow, but it became much colder at the end of last week and the last few days it has been busy snowing and now we are all white. The skiers are very happy and I don’t mind once it gets to Dec. it is Christmassy. Cec and I were very pleased because just before it got cold we had a few mild days and I covered up the roses and put away the hose etc. so we were all ready for winter. Please thank Auntie Muriel for her letter for me. Actually I have 2 to thank her for – one written after you got back and one after her birthday. I am so glad that she had such a happy birthday – it was nice for her that you were doing the housekeeping and could make such a nice treat for her without her having to worry. I wonder if you got my recipes for supper dishes after your cri de coeur about not knowing what to have for supper and if you tried them. I must mention all the gorgeous stamps on your letters from statehood etc. I am sending them to Dottie’s Tim – I always feel that Dottie’s sons are knowledgeably appreciative of stamps! I just opened one of your letters to answer, and had the wonderful surprise of finding your $5 bill inside! I am very hard up till payday tomorrow, so I am very happy! What happened was that I got Lindy the pantihose, and Charlie a very nice pair of green socks when I was out shopping and gave them to them on the grad. weekend and quite forgot I had paid for them, and never taken out your money – lovely! Both L. and C. were delighted with them and thought it was very sweet of you to think of it, and asked me to thank you. In the same letter, you were telling me that you had at last heard from Martin’s Bank that they have been taken over by Barclay’s. I wonder if it is really true that you would have to maybe pay back income tax if you transferred all your business to the St. V. bank? That Cambridge bank has been so inefficient and useless that you feel it would be a good thing to have your affairs within reach and be able to know what is going on, so I wonder if you perhaps couldn’t find out a bit more about it. Perhaps Peter might be able to find out for you, or you could ask the Manager here to really write to Head Office and find out properly. I can’t see that you would have to pay tax if you had already paid it in England. You don’t need to do anything beforehand, but I think you might make more enquiries. Probably the income tax in St. V. will go up now they have statehood and have to support themselves, but goodness knows the British Income Tax is high enough and surely the St. V. one wouldn’t be any higher. You were asking about Cec’s technician Geoff, with whom he used to drive. Well, he originally came from Winnipeg and during the summer he applied for a job there and got it, so he left while Cec was away. Our second car will have to wait a while I’m afraid – two university fees for 3 or 4 years is quite something – Linda’s fees this year for residence and tuition come to $1500 and then there is about $100 for books and of course she gets a bigger allowance now, and is supposed to buy clothes and everything with it. So far she has been very cautious and most of her spending has been on food (residence food is not very good!) and bus fares home! I told her I would pay for materials for things I made, but she would have to buy the ready made things and so far I don’t think she has broken down and bought anything yet. She has discovered the joys of exchanging clothes with the other girls and has been home in a pretty gold sweater and a few other things she has borrowed! She has let her hair grow and it is about to the bottom of her ears and she puts big rollers in and has a nice bouncy bob. She didn’t want to go to the hairdresser and get her hair all fancied up for the grad. and she had washed it the night before and set it and she looked very nice and was happy with it herself, which is a big thing. You can’t imagine how happy I am not to take her to the hairdresser anymore because each time she was in a frenzy because it looked so awful! While I was talking about your money I should have mentioned that both the Canada Savings Bond and the money invested here appreciates next year, but I think Cec said that he thought the new Canada Bonds were just about the best investment so probably we should just re-invest them for you. You were talking about sending us a cheque for Christmas – don’t forget that I have your cheque book, and start worrying about where it is! [Handwritten ending!] It is now Friday evening so I had better get this finished & mail it tomorrow. I spent all day making gingerbread men & have just packed a box to send some to Lindy! I will be writing again before Christmas but maybe you won’t get it, so I hope you have a really happy day. I sent my parcel quite early, but my card was late, so you may not get it. Much love to you & Auntie Muriel from Cyn.
I just want to say that the building of the National Arts Centre in the middle of the city near the canal, the downtown shopping district and market, the Parliament Buildings, and major hotels was a game-changer for Ottawa. All of a sudden in one building there were new restaurants, boutiques, with an attractive green space around the building and parking below, housing the three state-of-the art theatres of different sizes with lovely art inside and world class shows coming to or being created there in the nation’s capital. It made my Ottawa summers a dream- I could get last minute unoccupied seats for $1 with my university student card, and so it happened that where the well-dressed members of the audience circulated in the lobby before descending to the most expensive seats, happy but possibly scruffy students joined them and enjoyed the play or opera that much more!
49 Cedar Road, Ottawa 9, Ont.
Monday, 1st. Dec. [The day after Ottawa had won the Grey Cup! (Canadian football)]
Dearest Lindy, I wonder how you are feeling today and if you stayed up ALL night to finish your essays. I hope that you didn’t have to as I am sure that you will be very tired anyway, poor lombkin. Charlie stayed up till 3 am with his Elizabethan Audience, typing it out, so the two of you are one as bad as the other! Of course he was held up during the afternoon with THE GAME! Did you see it and wasn’t it gorgeous? Lovely Russ Jackson going out in such a blaze of glory. Phyl had phoned and asked us to go over and see the game with them on their colour TV and said that it wasn’t a party but just them, so Charlie excused himself from staying to dinner afterwards, but said he would like to see the game. He was serving at the 8:30 so I went too and then he worked on his essay, and I made the Advent Wreath (with many thanks to you) and took it to Sunday School. Sue had had a great argument with her Mother as to whether Advent began on Sunday or Monday, Mother saying Monday, so she hadn’t got one, so I said that after we had done it in my room, I would lend it to her and that is what we did. I had 17 little children, so it was enough without joining either Sue or Debbie and of course the kiddos enjoyed it. I gave Nancy the 3 year olds to show pictures in a very simple story, and I read the 4s a proper story, and it worked better as the 3s don’t even pay the littlest bit of attention when there are so many children. Anyway, I got back at about 12 and we rushed and had some lunch and I washed dishes and made beds and we left for the Douglases with Charlie at 12:30, and then who should arrive as well after us but Cy and Margie Garrett complete with big Saskatchewan Roughrider green and white colours on! Andy was there too, so it was quite a large and partisan company. Charlie was very well behaved and subdued, but Phyl and Margie screamed and yelled, so I did too, and it was lovely to have Ottawa win. Cy and Margie and Alex, who had been shouting for Sask. weren’t too broken hearted so it turned out to be a very jolly party. Andy took Charlie home after the game (he was doing an essay too on LOGIC), but we stayed and had a very nice dinner and arrived home at about 8:15 feeling as if we had been there for days. Thank you very much for your letter which arrived this morning and also for the one last week. I am so sorry that you didn’t get one from me last week, but the mail is so weird – I was sure that if Daddy posted it on Thurs. morning, it would reach you on Friday, but apparently not. I am sorry that you were so disappointed over the results of your Essay, but it isn’t surprising that the first one would be more difficult as you don’t know exactly what they want or anything. At least he did say that you hit on the root of the problem, even if it was just in the last two pages, and maybe the first part wasn’t so unnecessary after all. Anyway, you will probably find out each of the profs. has idiosyncrasies and want different things, so you can’t be expected to know all this right at the beginning. I am sure that although tired you must be feeling very lighthearted and gay to get both the English and Psych. ones off your hands, and maybe they will be more encouraging. You had a busy week with tutorials etc. last week so maybe this won’t be so hard. I am glad that you found your silver ring in your bed and I’m looking forward to seeing your Trent one. I hope that you have fun at the Hockey Game on Thursday, and the Peterborough wins! Charlie had a big boost to his morale last week – he brought home his Report and it was straight A’s! The first he ever got. Only Mr. Lafrenière spoilt the beautiful symmetry as he gave him a B for effort in French after giving him a mark of A. It was a glorious sight! He is now spurred on to even greater efforts and I do hope that all goes well.
My clever brother! I certainly never had a report like this.
He has to fill in the form this week saying which universities he wants to go to, so time is creeping on. Today is Election Day in Ontario so Daddy and I will be going out to vote for Mr. MacQuarrie when he gets home. There was a meeting of the candidates are down at the High School last Thurs. and Daddy went for a while and was given a big MacQuarrie notice which he was supposed to stand up and wave when the CANDIDATE stood up to speak, but you know how much waving Daddy would do! Maureen tells Charlie he is very worried about the result, but Daddy thinks he will get in. The MacQuarries are having Open House tonight after the polls close and Charlie told Maureen that he would be there, but I THINK he was joking! Daddy had a phone call on Friday from Surin Kalra, and he is going to be in Ottawa for a couple days with another Prof. from Waterloo, so Daddy is having a Men’s Party tonight for them. I have decided to make Quiche Lorraine in little tartlets and goodness knows what else. What do you think – I made Christmas cakes on Sat. and for some unknown reason I put in double the quantity of butter. They were oozing in the oven and I couldn’t think why until afterwards I looked at the recipe and thought golly – I didn’t put in half a pound – I put in a pound. Don’t tell anyone (here I mean) I didn’t! Fanni and Teddy came over on Sat. afternoon to see the pictures I took up the Gatineau the afternoon Fanni and Phyl and I went up with Claire for lunch. The pictures were lovely and I was very pleased with them and Fanni is going to get me some copies and send the lot to Claire for her talk to the English Club! Anyway, I had made some little cakes of the Christmas cake mixture and they had them and both said how nice they were, so the extra butter can’t have done any harm! I went to town on Friday morning to get money from the bank and various shoppings, and had a very interesting time. I parked on Albert St. right at the top near the Art Gallery, and suddenly thought I would go see what the Arts Centre Boutiques were like. I didn’t go into the Bistro – a kind of coffee place I think, and then there is a French Bookshop, but I went into the English bookshop and boutique and it is a lovely place and you will love it. The only thing against it is that it all smells violently of incense, but maybe they will run out of it before you come home. The bookshop has both paperbacks and big books, and is very well arranged and most suitable for browsing, and they don’t seem to mind a bit if you wander around and peer and read bits and then don’t buy! The boutique has gift-y things, some cute and all nice to look at, so I know you will enjoy going when you come home. After that, I went and shopped along Sparks St. and then dashed into Morgan’s to walk-through to Queen St. and so to the car. Lo and behold I was just dashing past the hosiery when a nice polite voice said “Can I help you, madame?” and here was Joey, doing her week’s selling there. She said it was nice and she was enjoying it and was getting paid. She also said that she was writing to you, so maybe you will hear from her first. Ruth L. and I are going down town tomorrow to try and get the Silver Wedding present for Marjorie and Dick. I am leaning towards a cut glass decanter now – no I know it isn’t silver, but you can get those little silver labels on chains saying ‘Sherry’ and we could get one of those to make it more silvery. I looked at all the things in Birks on Friday and silver bonbon dishes and ittybitty silver trays, etc. leave me cold, not to mention sauceboats and the like! Did I tell you that Margaret and Peter Savic had asked me to go to the Ottawa Opera Company with them last Wed? They were taking a friend and she was sick so they took me and I really enjoyed it immensely. It is ages since I saw an opera, apart from the Mozart ones we saw in Stratford, and actually, I don’t like his operas so much. [Such blasphemy from my own mother!] This was ‘Mignon’ which I had never seen before, but it was such fun, as soon as any of the important arias began I realized they were very familiar and I knew a lot of the songs. Do you remember in Little Women when Jo gets to know the Professor and he is homesick for Germany that he sings a song in German something like ‘Kenst du das landt?’ Well, to my surprise, it comes from ‘Mignon’ apparently and here was the girl singing ‘Connais-tu sa patrie?’ I was quite tickled and wished I’d had you there to poke and say ‘Do you remember?’ then and there. It was all in French, but there was an English synopsis and anyway I could understand one word in every ten! The people at the Arts Centre were as usual lots of fun to watch. There was a girl, tall and slim in a bright pink long evening coat, and when she took it off, she had a long, slim white evening dress, all covered with shimmery beads or sequins, and she had a long feather boa! With her was a very elegant young man in a dark suit, very mod, with a gorgeous flowery tie. His hair was longish but neat, and then in the paper a few days later, there was quite a write up about the Men’s Boutique Michael is working for at Carlingwood, and pictures of some of the clothes and the young designers of the things, and 2 of them looked very like this couple at the theatre. I asked Margaret how Michael was getting on but she just said OK, but the shop hadn’t yet opened, but was opening later in the week. Must stop and make goodies for Daddy’s party. Will continue later.
Wednesday. SNOW SNOW SNOW snow, snow snow! That’s what is busy happening! I wonder if you were having it in Peterborough too- lucky that you have your boots. I wore mine yesterday for the first time this season when Ruth L. and I went shopping, and the soles are rubber, and have begun to perish, so I ticky-tacky as I walk along! We had a nice morning and bought Dick and Marjorie a really pretty wine decanter – cut glass and a nice shape, but quite small and neat looking. We got a silver label saying ‘Sherry’ and I think that they will like it – I would! I now have to try and collect the money from everyone so I think that I will I take it down to the Coffee Party on Sat. and have people see it surreptitiously and sign the card and PAY ME. I am not doing anything too violent for the Coffee Party, but I will make gingerbread men on Friday and some candy or something. I have been having great fun, making funny little santa clauses out of the small wooden beads and funny small shapes of wood that the Nursery School have. I have painted them red and given them white bunny rabbit fur beards and made faces and they look very funny ha-ha and funny peculiar! Maybe some child will yearn for them. After Ruth and I had shopped, etc. I had arranged to pick up Daddy at 4pm and when I got there found him waiting outside and he came rushing up and said ‘Do you want to park the car at the back and come and see the astronauts? They are due here in a few minutes.’ So we parked and dashed back and Gisbert was there with his movie camera and we waited on the front steps and in about 2 minutes along came the cavalcade of cars and motorcycles down the road with a big black car in the middle flying 2 blue flags with APOLLO 11 on, and they drew up at the bottom of the steps, and Bill Snyder came welcoming down the steps, and all of us clapped heartily and beamed as they got out. Of course they looked so familiar from pictures and TV that you felt they were old friends and as Daddy said they weren’t big and heroic looking but just nice ordinary fellows that you could imagine coming to dinner. Their wives were in Ottawa with them but this was a press conference they were coming to at NRC so the wives must have opted out and gone to have a rest before the dinner and big do in the evening. They were in Montreal this morning and there was a big press conference on TV at 11 o’clock which I watched – I wonder if you saw it or if you didn’t know it was happening. Poor men – it was very stiff and starchy, and they must be bored to tears with such things. Talking of TV, did you see Simon and Garfunkel, one evening? A special – Sunday I think it was. Tonight there is Alec Guinness in ‘Twelfth Night’ but I wonder if you will be able to see it. There is no doubt the colour TV is a very great improvement – even the football game on Sunday looked twice as exciting. Twelfth Night would look lovely in colour! Surin and the other men came on Monday night and chitchatted until all hours. Surin looks just the same and exclaimed at the thought of you in University and was amazed at Charlie’s size. I must toddle along now and take this to the post. I am determined that you will get this letter before the weekend. I am enclosing the cheque, which no doubt you will be glad to see! I have been giving myself writers cramp with Christmas cards and have finally got off those to England, Spain, Poland, Sweden, etc. which should have gone 2 weeks ago! I think I am supposed to send parcels to the rest of Canada this week, but I am paying no attention! Lots of love honey bun – we have a fat, sleepy white pussy here who says prr-p. This morning Charlie left his big grey mittens on the radiator in the hall, and when he went to get his jacket on, here was pussy lying on top of the radiator with her front feet stretched out into the mittens! Much love Mummy.
This letter from my grandmother reminds me of how different my ‘60s’ attitude was, compared to that of my grandmother and even my mother. It was the flower children era! I was at university, free to study what I wanted (unlike my mother at my age), free to wear jeans every day to class if I wanted (and I did, although I believe my high school finally stopped insisting that girls wear skirts after I left), although I also enjoyed dressing up in my mother’s creations. It’s just that the graduation ceremony and dinner/dance after were not as important to me as they were in their eyes, because they had had dances that had been rites of passage for them. By November 1969, I had moved on, and the rituals of high school no longer mattered that much. I had enjoyed the weekend, seeing my friends again, wearing my lovely outfits, going through the graduation ceremony, celebrating with my brother and cousin and friends, but I was focused on my new life and was enjoying it a lot more than high school!
Noyack, St. Vincent
Nov. 29th. 69.
Dearest Lindy, I have just realized that if I don’t hurry & get this letter to you at College, you will be going home for your Xmas vacation; I wonder how long a holiday you’ll have? – much longer than when at school I suppose? – Well! all the excitement of Graduation & the Ball, are all over – & I guess you wish you could have it all over again, or don’t you? I hope you had a really lovely time, your Mum send me the patterns of both your dresses, &, I think they were both beautiful – the mini one for graduation – would be so unusual, no other girl would have anything like it – being as how it came all the way from India! Then I liked your choice of the laminated blue material for the evening frock, exceedingly much! & my Lindy must’ve looked very beautiful!- I only wish I could have had a peep at her! Please take lots of pictures for me to see both you, & Charlie – as I hear, he was looking very smart in his new suit, with waist-coat, and all! I hope you both had a grand time & that Bruce was a good dancer – did you ‘Samba’ & ‘Jump-up’ and do all the strange, silly dances they do these days? Say what you like, a waltz takes a lot of beating! I am sure you were all a bit worried about your dad’s operation, & having to be in hospital, &, I was so thankful to hear it was safely over & he was home again. I wonder if your Saki cat missed you? When I was away, my little Sally cat had 4 kittens but Auntie M. gave them all away before I returned – about which I was sorry – however, she has just produced another 4 kits!! I am thinking of selling them at the Bazaar! The only trouble is, they will hardly have had their eyes open 2 weeks, poor wee things, but I do think a basketful of kittens would be quite an attraction don’t you? While I was away M’s dog ‘Andy’ was quite sick – in fact, Moo thought he was dying – however at the sight of me, he recovered! He is a good watchdog, but he barks at every sight & sound & nearly drives me silly – but we don’t like to stop him in case of thieves around. Our church bazaar comes off on 6th – so we only have a week left & I am getting real nervous, as it’s the first time I’ve really had a stall on my own, but Auntie M. & Mrs. Glenn will help me – I sent you off home a small Xmas parcel, nothing much just a remembrance & Cyn will get you something with the cheque I’m sending her. It’s late so I’ll say good night. God bless – much love, yours aye – Grannie.
[Written sideways on the first page:] Your nice letter came at last & I enjoyed it v. much.
I am posting this on the day of the Coronation of King Charles III, and so am moving from the memories of an event in my own life that this letter raises, to memories from this blog in earlier days, when I posted my grandmother’s Memoir and then letters to my grandmother from Cyn, about the royal occasions she witnessed which were important to her. If anyone is interested, search the blog for Royal Wedding- where Cyn experienced the crowds of London herself- or Coronation- where Cyn, 5 1/2 years later, is married, mother of two, and living in Canada. These are the documents:
Carol’s School Memoir (just scroll down to the Coronation postcard, 1911) November 23 1947: The Royal Wedding; Coronation Day 1953; June 10, 1953.
I will be watching on television myself, although not at 5:30 am, partly because I love choral music and partly because I enjoy the pageantry but mostly because my mother and grandmother would have loved it.
Now, back to 1969, with the aftermath of our great graduation weekend.
49 Cedar Road
Monday – 24th?
Darling Lindy, I hope that you had a good trip back, and that you and Bruce snoozed happily. Also that you got a nice welcome back and weren’t kept out of bed till all hours. You must have been really tired – I know that Daddy and I had an afternoon nap after you left and Charlie was in bed in fairly good time. Now, before I forget:
I found your little red umbrella in your closet under your dressing gown.
You left your short brown kilt here – am I to do anything about it?
You left your big score of the MIKADO here – do you need it?
You mentioned taking your skates – now or after Christmas? I think that there is something like Parcels Express on the bus, so I could send the things by that I expect as they are too heavy to mail but let me know anyway. Perhaps if you are working hard and it isn’t too long till you come home you will just leave them till later. Daddy has gone to work this morning and it seems strange to be more or less back in the old routine after 3 weeks occupied with Daddy and hospital, etc. He seems to be fine, but he’s coming home early today to see the astronauts splash down, and will take it easy this week. [Apollo 12’s return to earth.] I have been doing the melancholy job of stripping beds, etc. and tidying up, which is always very dull after the fun of getting things ready for your visits, but I must fly around with Christmas parcels for England and Christmas cards and Christmas cakes and making things for the Coffee Party next Sat. week so the time will go quickly. Have you any particular yearning for a special thing for Christmas? If so, let me know and I’ll see if we can afford it! I just phoned the Arts Centre and asked about ‘Casse Noisette’. It is only going to be here 19th and 20th Dec. and the bookings open next week so I thought it would be nice for Charlie’s birthday on Friday 19th and will dash down and book the moment that I hear. It would be fun to go out to dinner and make a real celebration of it – I might even break down and get more expensive seats! I have been talking to Marjorie on the phone and we are having a Nursery School Committee meeting on Wed. morning, so I have to do some work on my accounts before that. I was offering to help Marjorie at her open house on 13th December (for her Silver Wedding but people aren’t supposed to know) as Jocelyn will just be just about producing then. I also said that if you weren’t booked, I thought you would like to help Jeanie with the passing around etc. One of Marjorie’s friends is going to be in the kitchen heating things, etc. and I will be there and I thought it might be fun. If you don’t think so, we can always make an excuse, but it will be mostly people you know from the Church I expect.
Wednesday. Well, honey – one of my questions was answered! I hope that you get the Mikado book soon – I mailed it yesterday afternoon, so it should reach you by Thursday at the latest. I spent all day yesterday doing N. S. accounts, and we had an N. S. meeting at Marjorie’s this morning. Fees and salaries up next year! Thank you for your letter, and I am glad that you had such a welcome and enjoyed the bus trip more than usual. I am sure that you are bogged down with your essays, so I expect this will be a very nose-to-the-grindstone week. We aren’t doing anything very exciting, except that Margaret Savic has just phoned and said that they were taking a friend to the opera ‘Mignon’ tonight and she is ill and would Daddy or I like to come. Daddy isn’t interested so I am going with loud cheers – seems like a long time since I went out. It is at the Arts Centre – Theatre? I think. Charlie told me yesterday that the Gloucester team had won the Debating at Merivale. Apparently Kiloran got best speaker, and Penny was just a point behind and they won the senior, and Penny Scoley and someone else were 2nd in the Junior, I think. Anyway, Mrs. Pierce said that K. and P. had decided to be funny and had kind of spoofed it – I don’t know what the topic was but the example she gave me was ‘A Rock Festival’ which they translated as being the Stoning of the Martyrs. Apparently they had the audience in gales of laughter, and afterwards all the other kids were saying ‘Did you practice a lot? Did your coach help you much?’ etc. etc. and in the usual Gloucester fashion they had never seen their coach and had been frantically writing their speeches the night before! Charlie has been on the late bus the last 2 nights with Basketball games but he will be home soon, so I had better go and finish the dinner. Whoops – just caught the cabbage burning! Lots of love from the family and purrs from pussy. Mummy
Note included with the Mikado book: Monday a.m. Darling – Just got the mail – here is your book – hope it doesn’t take as long to reach you as Charlie’s from you did. Went to coffee at Fanni’s to say goodbye to Claire- she gave me a little green clutch purse – don’t know if it matches your greens [Trent’s colour, gowns and all.] – Love Mummy
I had been on the Debating Team. Although I had never won a whole tournament, I could certainly relate to the Gloucester methodology (which I carried on with my essays at Trent) of last minute preparation and had always assumed that the coach existed solely to drive the team of 4 to the event. As for the score of The Mikado, I must have brought it home to pick out a tricky bit on the piano, and now needed it for rehearsal!
This is the second letter posted under this date- the first was Cyn writing to her mother, and this one is to her daughter Linda. I am finally catching up with the letters already posted and trying to integrate the cache recently discovered with the letters carefully preserved by my grandmother. By the end of 1969 I hope they will all be published in chronological order once again. (Although there are so many new ones with imperfect dates…)
In this letter, all the events of November 1969 in the Costain household are being reviewed in a hasty manner. In Ottawa, Cec is home on sick leave from work, after a 2 week stay in hospital and a thyroid operation. Cyn is looking after him, dealing with the Nursery School accounts and focusing hard on Linda’s Graduation outfits which she is making, and accessories, which she is buying. Charlie is getting on with his Grade 13 subjects- top in Math, having trouble with an English essay- while he and his friends get ready for their Grade 12 Graduation which will be celebrated at the same time as Linda’s Grade 13. (I’m sure Cyn would be ordering his date’s corsage along with the one my cousin Bruce was asking her to get for me.) Meanwhile Linda is away at university writing her own essays, but not yet getting feedback by having them returned. (Both she and Charlie will do just fine.) The big exciting Graduation Weekend is coming up and Linda (and Bruce) will be jumping on the bus on Friday in time to get to Ottawa for the ceremony.
49 Cedar Rd. Tues. 18th Nov.
Dearest Lindy, What a horrid rainy morning. Charlie has just gone for the bus, Daddy is sleeping, and Saki is sitting on the radiator with her feet up on the window sill. I hope that if it’s the same in Peterborough that you can borrow an umbrella. I am going to sew today & finish your long dress. The other one is done & I will make you a headband. Are you getting excited? Audrey Haynes phoned me last night about Nursery School money, and Janet chipped in to ask me to tell you that she & Carol Anne Dologh are having a “get-together” at the Dologh’s after the Graduation on Friday & you & Bruce are invited. She says it isn’t a party really, but it sounds fun. I asked Charlie if any of his class had come up with parties, etc. after Commencement, etc. & he said “Oh yes – Pat Kemp is having a breakfast party at 6 a.m. after the dance on Saturday night!” He said he & Bob Hirsch were trying to figure out what to do between say 1:30 a.m. and 6 a.m.! As I told you on the phone Brucie didn’t tell me any definite plans when he called. You had better not tell him you know about his asking me to get the corsage as it is probably supposed to be a secret! I will call Mrs. Sylvester at the Maplegrove Greenhouses this morning & see how soon they have to be ordered. Oh, I nearly forgot- I had a letter yesterday from your Grannie (E) enclosing some money to get you a really nice pair of pantyhose for your Grad- wasn’t that sweet of her? I thought I would ask around town about the toeless ones & if I can’t get any I would just get you ordinary ones. I looked at gold earrings & got one pair, but they were too red a gold when I got them home, so I will have another look. Daddy seems to be getting on pretty well. He is sleeping & eating well since he came home, but I think he had a kind of letdown. Perhaps he felt when he got home he would be OK but of course, he’s not & his nerves are jittery, &, he’s restless, but I thought that yesterday he was more relaxed, so perhaps it is improving. The scar on his neck is healing, & I got him a beautiful silk cravat to wear, so he should look very distinguished. He goes to see the surgeon on Thursday. How is the English essay going? I hope that you were satisfied with Sparta when you got it finished & that you get this one done in time to give it to the typing lady. Charlie is struggling with his “Elizabethan audiences” & complicated matters by leaving his English notebook (plus essay outline) in the Rideau Street Library! However, he continues to top Grade 13 in Math so we can excuse his groans over English! Did you by any chance see Wayne & Shuster on Sunday evening? [Canadian comedians on TV. Their skit ‘Rinse the Blood off my Toga’ (Julius Caesar was on the Ontario Grade 10 curriculum so everyone was familiar with it) was a family favourite.] We thought they were very funny. Did you get back your 1st essay yet? Have to get Daddy’s breakfast so I must go. See you SOON. Lots of love Mummy.
Darling Lindy, Just a short note to send your cheque and to say thank you for your sweet little note on the sewing machine. I am glad you had a nice time honey & it was lovely having you at home. I’m sorry I was cross sometimes but I was worried about Daddy & tired with dashing about. It seemed awfully quiet when both of you had left last night & there was just Charlie & me, & pusskins left. I went to bed & read Little L. Fauntleroy! This morning I talked on the telephone to Phyl, Fanni, Ruth L. a Nursery Sch. woman, Johnson Motors, Betty D. Mrs. Davis & Mary Catto, so I didn’t get much work done! Some phoned me about Daddy & some I called about Marjorie & Dick’s Silver Wedding. I also measured at & pinned your blue skirt & will have it ready for you. I am going to go down town now on the way to see Daddy. I want new white frilly for my red dress as the other has lost its oomph & I will go into Astor Chapeau & look for the purse while I’m there. Did you have a good trip back & eat all the goodies? I wonder what the hot cookies did to the fudge. I hope they were all edible anyway. Must run – will phone tomorrow night, so I’ll be talking to you before you get this probably. Lots of love Mummy
P.S. Had a letter from Grannie (E.) this morning & she had got your letter forwarded from New York.
A Family History in Letters 